Monday, January 30, 2006

Quick Shots (TiVO and Otherwise)

- I cannot watch the end of Return of the King without crying, I confess. I didn't cry this time when Sam carried Frodo up Mount Doom but damn I was still helpless when everybody bows before the hobbits, and when Sam gets married... forget about it. Ever since I sat next to the teenage girls during ROTK in the theater and the one tremulously gasped "OH SAM!" when Sam kisses Rosie that scene has been ruined for me. Just joking. And for the record Fellowship of the Ring is also hilarously underestimated, every bit as Led Zeppelin as Two Towers and as emotionally satisfying as the Oscar slaying ROTK, a real pleasure to view with ROTK in the rearview mirror...

- I also watched the beginning and end of Smallville before I deleted it and damn I teared up again during the Pa Kent death and funeral scenes, this time apparently because I wasn't crowing over being right in my ESP. There was some genuine emotion in those scenes, and by gum it was a great episode.

- According to AICN Cartoon Network is cancelling my guiltiest TiVO pleasure Justice League Unlimited, the excellently written Superfriends on LSD for the 21st Century that featured some of the best voice casting around, and no cheesy ass shit. Oh well.

- "Entangled" and "Ripples", the slow jam outs on A Trick of the Tail, are awesome songs, some of Genesis' best. The new Flaming Lips ringtones are hot, spiffy to the max. I so cannot wait for their new album...

- Every Simpsons season has some fluff, funny yet aimless episodes that just sort of fill in between the exemplary installments and the occasional classic, and this week's entry fell into this category.

- 24 is still off the hook. James Bond... I mean Jack Bauer is on the mutha, the moral cowardice of the President is wicked entertainment, Samwise Gamgee is rocking, and the tension (Jesus H.Christmas! Nerve Gas people!) is preposterous. Still the best thrill ride on TV, hands down.

- WNY Coalition for Progress State of the Union Viewing Party, tomorrow night at JP Bullfeather's, 8:30 PM. A good time will be had by all.

Saturday, January 28, 2006

Fuck Oprah

I'm with Jeff Jarvis on this one, I am tired of her self help guru for homebound noodleheads shit, and the fact that this role has clearly and completely warped Oprah's brain so that she see's this as perfectly A-OK. And why the fuck is she on EVERY SINGLE cover of her magazine? The woman has created and devoted an entire magazine to herself and her guru bullshit! "It's OK that it wasn't true because the redemptive aspect of the books is still good..." Objective truth is meaningless so long as the lies make you feel better?!? Fuck!!!! Enough people. Pull yourselves together!

I hate to say it folks, but there's a lot of reasons why our American brains are being sucked out through our noses, and Oprah Winfrey is one of the biggest.

Bono is Starting to "Bug" Me... Again

I've loved U2 for 20 years, but not always as faithfully as I do now... there was a period in the late 80's when Bono became just too goddamned obnoxious, everything an IMPORTANT STATEMENT, as epitomized by one of the most cloying moments in a documentary EVER when Bono sililoquizes about Mandela and whether Bono was "bugggin' ya?" during "Silver and Gold" in the Rattle and Hum movie. Yes, this turned me off. The footage of four rich rock stars frowning everywhere they went, the weight and suffering of the world squarely on their rock star shoulders... this ran totally against my middle class, proletariat view of rock stardom, and I got tired of it. It wasn't until Achtung Baby and the leather pants and humor that I enjoyed U2 again, and for a long time my total love of U2 reigned supreme.

Until now perhaps. Hobnobbing with Dipshit Bush for the greater good is one thing, but hoping into bed with American Express, Versace, Gap, and Nike to produce a special Amex card to fight aids? What the fuck? A goddamned credit card? It's bad enough that we are back in the Gilded Age when the super rich moved, ran, and tried to save the world, but this might be too much for this here U2 fan, and of course that worries me.

Friday, January 27, 2006

Trouble

- This is the absolute truth, exactly what happens when people spend more meaningful time with their coworkers than their actual "people" (family, friends). Yipes.

Hot Time in the Old Town Tonight

- Tonight's Sabres v Leafs game is another knock down drag out classic. 9 goals in 2 periods, and I wish more than 5 of them were ours. The third period is going to be tough.

- Links. I give you links to all sorts of stuff.

- I forgot to mention that I got the Harry Potter and the Half Blood Prince audiobook on cd yesterday. That means I got em all. I also got my UK editions of the first two books in hardcover from Amazon.ca, which I means I got them all too, my library complete except for the final book, which so many wait for. This officially heals the hurt of being snubbed for Dave Gilmour tickets a few weeks back, after which I ordered this merchandise.

- According to the latest Rolling Stone: Neil Young is a god, Radiohead is going on tour this summer (and this time no episode at the show), and Larry Wachowski is a wacko, who's love of deviant sex overshadowed his love of cinema and is largely responsible for the lousy Matrix sequels. All things in moderation indeed...

- Kicked in the Nuts is priceless, profoundly hilarious. Channel101.com is the shit, pure and simple.

- 10:06 PM Update: 12 goals total, 8 of them for us. Another fine effort, and for the record Lindy Ruff is the best coach the Sabres have ever had.

- The 100th episode of Smallville was ludicrusly wonderful, thunderously operatic, the first 10 minutes mind boggling, and hot damn I called it: Pa Kent is dead and even though I new it was going to happen (because that's what I do) I was still profoundly moved when it happened, a wonderful homage to that iconic scene from the first Superman movie, a scene that still hits me in the gut to this day. And Peter Gabriel for the cemetary scene. Wow. Bow down before me Attorney Dave! And now, Smallville is about Clark Kent, the man before Superman. Let's see how that works out, and where it goes from here.

- But seriously, John Schneider was rock solid for 100 episodes, in a role that might well mark him forever to me as PA KENT rather than Bo Duke. If Smallville has added anything to the Superman mythos it's how it's showed what makes Superman the man he is, a hero he is: the love of his parents, their values, and their faith in him, and while Annette O'Toole is a gift that keeps on giving as Ma Kent, Schneider brought a lot of heart and grit, and truth to his role, and to say that he will be missed is a profound understatement.

- The Encyclopedia Brown reference during Seth's first burn on The OC was priceless. I even remember the book he specifically mentions under the influence. Man I used to love Encyclopedia Brown, and The Baker Street Irregulars...

Thursday, January 26, 2006

Comics You Should Read, Really

Cleaning out my Drafts folder...

Every now and again I will give you Cliff's Comics He Thinks You All Should Read:

All Star Superman #2. Mythic, the perfect way to get ready for Superman Returns this summer at the movies. Grant Morrison artfully distills 70 years of Supermanicana within his own superimaginative patois, and I want to buy a page of Frank Quietly art from this book and frame it. Head over to Chuck at Seeley and Kane's and pick this up and issue 1 and you will be in business. Heady stuff.

Sgt. Rock: The Prophecy #1. Back in the 50's and 60's Joe Kubert revolutionized comic book storytelling for all generations to come, the beginning of the cinematic comic artist, and with this book he's back to challenge all comers. Fantastic storytelling, a gritty, pitch perfect WWII comic that is beatifully drawn, perfectly colored, and each page a masters class in the art of comic book storytelling, and how and why they are taking over the movies.

And coming up and back in a few weeks is Joss Whedon and John Cassiday's titanic Astonishing X-Men #13 (after a brief hiatus so they can faithfully make their monthly dates for this 12 issue run), and if you want to get on board for this legendary run find yourself a copy of Astonishing X-Men: The Saga, a nice encapsulation Cliff Notes version of their magnificent first 12 issues, or better yet pick up the nice trade paperbacks of all 12 issues and go nuts. Also breathtakingly cinematic, bold, with amazing dialogue, crisp storytelling and sharp, mythic appraisals of these classic characters (also contemporary cinema fodder). If these guys can do 36 issues this might be the best run on X-Men ever.

I Have No Idea What The Fuck I Am Doing

Apparently I had comments and they've just been sitting there. Sorry folks. In addition to spilling forth on this and that I promise to do a better job keeping track of this here thang. And there will be template changes every now and again because sometimes I just get tired of stuff.

Also, if anybody knows how to work this blogspot thing so I can add links and stuff to this site please contact me, I need some goddamned assistance I am so helpless with this shit. But at least I can admit it. I refuse however to recant on my Bon Jovi comments. I've talked to their fans and know what they are really about- "AWW MY GOD JOHN BON JOVI IS SOOO CUTE"... I also have it on good authority that "RITCHIE ISN'T LOOKING TO BAD EITHER."

Like I said before: I'd rather put shit in my mouth than listen to Bon Jovi.

A Nice Day Off

So far:

- I've watched last night's Lost, another fine episode. Unfortunately if you haven't jumped on by now forget about it. Don't worry however, this gem is not out of your reach as I am sure ABC will do another groovy Peter Coyote narrated summarization before the third season.

- Wrapped up my FIFA 2006 career as Heathcliff Parks at Ajax in the Dutch Eridevise and moved up to the demanding British Premeire with Newcastle United in the central midlands. Bloody madness this league, and I suspect I've added grief to my life with this move from the relatively tranquil Dutch league. Whoops.

- Savored the second disc of Harry Potter and the Order of the Phoenix on audiobook. Jim Dale nails the abundant witch and wizard adult dialogue as the Potterverse goes even more widescreen. It's intriguing that many think it's the sixth book that gave Rowling adult lit cred but I suspect it's in the fifth that she tightened it up and went wild.

- And blogged and blogged.

And now some work.

Wednesday, January 25, 2006

Superman 3 Wednesday

Well folks I'm pretty sure that I cracked this morning. Yep, it finally happened. After calling into work this morning at 7 AM and failing to get a vacation day ("we don't have any more available" they sez to me... on a WEDNESAY... IN FUCKING JANUARY! JANUARY!) I had it OUT with myself. I was off Tuesday on a personal day because I had bowel troubles and didn't want to take a disciplinary step over what probably amounted to some bad Mighty Taco and beer, and with Thursday my scheduled day off (thanks to my four 10 hour day work week) and Friday a steward's meeting (= no talking to shithead customers for 10 hours!) I REALLY WANTED today off in toto. But I couldn't JUST take another personal day... WHAT IF YOU WANT THEM DURING THE SUMMER? I thought...

BUT IT'D BE A 6 DAY WEEKEND!

WORK'S STILL GONNA SUCK ON MONDAY!

BUT THAT'S MONDAY! 5 DAYS FROM NOW!

COME ON MAN- DON'T FLAKE OUT. YOU CAN DO IT.

FUCK THAT- 6 DAY WEEKEND! FUCK THAT GODFORSAKEN PLACE!

PULL YOURSELF TOGETHER! PEOPLE WILL THINK YOU'VE FLAKED OUT!

THAT'S RIGHT! PEOPLE WILL TALK! THE OFFICE WILL SAY "CLIFF'S LOST IT!"

AAARGH! AND I'M TRYING TO FLY UNDER THE RADAR! OK I'LL GO.


This all while I'm sitting on my bed pulling on my socks, and frankly, man was I pooped from this whole battle. Resigned to my fate (another miserable day) my shoulders drooped but then LAUGHTER! I remembered that Daily Show segment about the guy who dresses up as Superman and walks around the Sunset Strip and the nut proudly telling Dan Bakkedahl that the Superman suit he was wearing was from Superman 3 "when Superman was fighting himself in a junkyard" and Bakkedahl saying how he'd too had fought himself in a junkyard, drunk.

Superman: But look on the bright side, somebody won.

Bakkedahl: No, nobody won after that.


And I sat on my bed, thought to myself HEY! IT'S SUPERMAN 3 WEDNESDAY! Then laughing a tad too loudly I finished getting dressed... but before I could leave the house...

WOW CLIFF YOU ARE PRETTY MESSED UP!

YES THAT IS TRUE, BUT THAT WOULD MAKE FOR A GREAT BLOG POST! OR A CHAPTER FOR YOUR BOOK ABOUT WORKING IN CORPORATE HELL... WHY DON'T YOU CALL IN AND TAKE A PERSONAL DAY AND WORK ON THEM....

AHA FUCKER! I'M ONTO YOU! NICE TRY!


And then I went to work where for the rest of the morning I was prone to occasional giggle fits.

Thankfully I am better now.

Sunday, January 22, 2006

West Wing Countdown

Savor The West Wing while you can. This week's episode was a standard classic: taut, multilayered, a smackdown to El Presidente's Katrina management, and a masters class on modern politics in the internet age. Outside of President Roslin on BSG this is totally the only White House show worth watching and our nation will be the poorer when it ends in May.

And god, wasn't Donnatella Moss awesome? Man she is great. I'd love to watch a show with her as the Press Secretary and Bail ____ing Organa as the President. Damn we wuz robbed!

A Goddamn Travesty!

Mirrored on the WNY Progress Report Blog:

A Travesty!
January 22nd, 2006 by Cliff

The West Wing cancelled after 7 seasons! A terrible turn of events. A pox on NBC!
- I'm with the magnificent, glorious Maureen Dowd- I too am not in love with the idea of Darth Cheney "oogling my Googling." Beware the evil empire folks.

- AICN reports via Billy West that Futurama is coming back with 4 DVD movies with everybody coming back. Now I think it's time to get Futurama 2-4 on DVD and complete my Matt Groening shrine.

- The Simpsons on the new 32 inch TV are glorious, the episode where Bart and the gang rent a car and drive down to the 1982 World's Fair sparkled and just made me laugh and laugh. And as an added bonus- a NEW episode tonight. God bless us... God bless everybody.

Saturday, January 21, 2006

Hot Damn

Mail recieved:

Hello Cliff,

It’s a new year and we have some news for you!
We are currently in the process of recording a new studio album with producer Bob Rock. Once completed, we will be out on the road performing select shows in Canada, the USA and Europe this year. Be sure to check back with us online at
www.thehip.com and look for more emails from us, keeping you absolutely up-to-date with the latest announcements and details.

We are also very excited to tell you about the development of our first ever paid members-only fan site, aptly named, The Hip Club (THC). This is not to be confused with the now defunct Hip Club that ran back in 2002. THC will be the ultimate place for everything Hip. With the paid membership, you will get front-of-the-line opportunities for concert tickets, special audio and visual content, an online and in-depth Q and A with the band, members-only merchandise, and EXCLUSIVE access to “Hip Club Only” special events, shows and other surprises.To help get us ready, we are doing some long overdue house cleaning, so please take the time to update your user information and preferences to ensure you don’t miss a beat.

Thanks.

Das Hip


Booyah. And Lawyer Dave is moving to NYC and said we should come on down when the Hip plays NYC (someplace cool in NYC no doubt). Cool. And best of all now the fellas are down with multiple Hip shows this year, after checking out some great shows in Rochester and Hamilton Ont back in 2004... even better.


Update:

Damn the Sabres got hosed. Not a great showing.

Saturday Update

- Many thanks to Buffalo Pundit for the link up and the blurb on his always swell site.

- Thanks to all the bloggers at the Bloggercon for mentioning this here thing. Of course anybody who came over has been treated to poop talk and a total perv-out, but what are going to do, that's honesty folks. I loves mah shows.

- REMINDER - Free Screening of the “Lost Boys of the Sudan” on Tuesday, January 24, 2006January 21st, 2006 by Mark
The Western New York Coalition For Progress is Proud to Host a Film Screening, Panel Discussion And Charity Event - “Lost Boys Of The Sudan” on Tuesday, January 24, 2006 at 7:30 pm at UB’s Center for the Arts.
Admission is free, but donations to Journey’s End Resettlement Services of cash or the following necessities which will be given to newly arrived refugees will be gratefully accepted: bath and dish towels, hygiene products, or cleaning supplies.
Nelson Starr, Vice President of the WNY Coalition for Progress and event co-chair, said, “The plight of Sudanese refugees has not received the attention it deserves. This documentary follows two Sudanese refugees orphaned by the civil war as they depart their war-ravaged homeland and come to live in the United States. Their tale from war and horror to the culture shock of American suburbia is extraordinary and compelling.”
A panel discussion addressing the plight of refugees from the war torn region of Darfur in the Sudan will follow the screening. Among the panelists will be Sudanese refugees residing right here in Western New York, as well as SUNY Distinguished Service Professor Dr. Claude E. Welch, Jr. Professor Welch is regarded as the preeminent scholar on African political affairs at University at Buffalo. Journey’s End Refugee Services of Buffalo is helping to organize the discussion.

- The new TV is awesome. 32 inches. It took some home improvement to get it into the entertainment stand, but after much sweat, toil, and a strained back it is in and all is good. Better in fact, everything is better: (after "optimizing" with some THX technology) the first 10 minutes of Episode III on DVD, live Premiership soccer, FIFA 2006, Star Wars: Battlefront 2, and now the hockey game, which we are losing.

- The LOTR marathon is moved up to next Saturday, at 10 AM, and it will be good, better than last year, and the perfect wrap up to my last LOTR jag for a while.

- We got ____ed. Totally ____ed. That dude totally kicked that puck into the net, but when Buffalo tries to call the video ref they couldn't get through to challenge the call and demand a review... whoops.... communication breakdown?!? ____ that. Another NHL hosing for our lads. The good news is that his game is jumping off. Let it all hang out tonight Sabres!

I am a total pervert (cleaning off the TiVO)

Yikes. The OC's Caitlyn (?) Cooper sure ain't Cousin Norbert; in fact I suspect she might be closer to Worf joining the cast of Deep Space Nine- tearing and shaking ____ up, and next week she's gonna get a stressed out Seth stoned. Man, and boy is she going to be trouble for noble Johnny the existential surfer dude. But really, it's all a ruse, it's really all about the outfits: the Britney Spears classic schoolgirl, the black number, hell, every scene. I'm just a total perv; thankfully I also perv on this week's MILF-A-RAMA: Kiki, Cruella DeVille, and Julie, who I will now name: Black Mamba as now she's angling to marry Summer's dad (Michael Nuri- hilarious). The show's bloody brilliant. Plus, I liked how they broke up Summer's dad and Cruella DeVille by feeding info to Cruella's daughter (the reformed Taylor Townsend) that Summer's Dad voted for John Kerry, a plot that precisely and totally chased Cruella out of the picture.

Clark's about to tell Lana Lang that he's not from around here on Smallville, and I still think Pa Kent is gonna DIE on next week's 100th episode. This show is HOT, burning with mythos, and either way it's about to burn hotter.

This week's Office was profound, again, this time chronicling among other things corporate pursuit of a sick employee (Boss Michael to lackey Dwight: "I want you to drop what you are doing and make this your top priority"), and the airing of a secret to an office full of people who spend more time with those people than with their other people (friends, family)... always a tough one. Funny and true.

I watched BSG before I passed out last night and it was good, but will have to be watched again.

Now, a mission to buy a new television.

Bon Jovi

I'd rather put ____ in my mouth than listen to or go see Bon Jovi. I know that's harsh but the work happy hour was at Pearl St. last night and damn... Bon Jovi fans everywhere, and it was sort of hilarious. Whenever somebody played BJ on the jukebox a group of chicks with dubious hair would drunkenly belt it out while invariably the dudes they were with grimaced and looked at the ceiling; clearly they too would have rather put ____ in their mouths but they had no choice- they were getting some later, after their penance, and that's the price they paid. And anybody who calls BJ a hair metal band in the past tense is dreaming- judging from those shots in Gusto (kudos to Jeff Meirs for not coming out and totally slagging them off in his article, preserving his journalistic virtue) I'd say their hair is still extremely important to the equation.

Jesus, when I made my choice back in the mid 80's between Bon Jovi and U2... I chose wisely.


The good news, I've been washing my ears out with Radiohead's My Iron Lung import EP, purchashed for $10 at the Hamburg Record Theater instead of the customary $20, $25; and it is good: groovy b-sides and Radiohead on the make, exponentially growing and on the cusp of their first epic The Bends (the record most Brit Rockers subconsiously, or unsubconsciously rip off). Good ____.

Friday, January 20, 2006

Redux

I got a few seconds during a commercial break. As you can see I've changed the template; I don't know, I'm buzzed, and I felt like it. The old one was hard on the eyes. Gimmicky. The new one is spare, and the red banner is UNION RED BABY. That's the way I roll.

Unless I change it to classic blue and Sabres gold. I'm feeling nostalgic tonight. What a great hockey game.

Thursday, January 19, 2006

The Return of Jazz to Hockey

Somewhere in my Hip cds I've got Gord Downie lamenting the absence of "jazz" from modern hockey (goddamn NJ Devils!) during a question/answer session with some lucky Canadians, and I always agreed with him. The nuetral zone belonged in Star Trek, not professional hockey, and the game lost a lot of mojo that I enjoyed so thoroughly since I was a kid going to games at the Aud with Grandpa or somebody (I seem to recall getting to games with all sort of people in the other season ticket). But no longer. Connolly is dipsy doodling like a Montreal Canadien in the old black and white footage! It is clear to me that indeed the abolition of the two line pass rule has brought the game back to it's legendary past just in time for the future, and if you aren't digging hockey on some level this season there's something wrong with you, and you should certainly ponder it so you can get back on track enjoying life in Buffalo.

And hot damn another power play goal. Palminville (sic)! It's going to be a late night but it's going to worth it. Go Sabres.


ALERT- New Battlestar Galactica tomorrow night! ____ing Admiral Adama. And the US has risen to 7th in the FIFA world rankings, hot ____! To HELL with this talk of the "group of death"... it's going to be gnarly in the first round but screw it, I like our chances.

Tough Guy Talk

Todd Bertuzzi is such a dirty ____ing cocksucker. I saw that cheapshot on Ryan Miller. I remember who he broke that dude's neck, and I don't hold with that ____. And I had just been talking about how much I'd like to visit Vancouver, especially after hearing the organ player during the game belt out some White Stripes. He's a goddamn blight on that otherwise fine city!

Go Sabres.

Tuesday, January 17, 2006

Hey Now

How do you like those apples? What does The Office, Weeds, and Lost have in common? Well, in addition to all being Golden Globe winners last night, all have been strenuously blogged about on this here site. What does this mean? It means I have taste. My shows don't suck. My record collection doesn't suck, nor does any of my other ____. That is the way it is, that's the way I roll, and that's why I will never steer you wrong. Stick with me kids. It's fun.

And I would like to thank the Hollywood Foreign Press for having the same taste as me in television. Booyah! As far as the movies, I suspect the HFP is screwing with our American inhibitions, stirring our misbeggoten pot.